


Dirty Mouth

by Fic (EosRose), readbyjela (jelazakazone)



Category: Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: Audio Format: M4B, Audio Format: MP3, Collaboration, Gen, Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic Length: 0-10 Minutes, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-08
Updated: 2013-10-08
Packaged: 2017-12-28 15:54:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/993758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EosRose/pseuds/Fic, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jelazakazone/pseuds/readbyjela
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan has an important message to teach about the joys of cussing.</p><p>Fic by eos rose.<br/>Podfic by jelazakazone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dirty Mouth

**Author's Note:**

> **Author's Notes:** This is the first thing I've written in a _long_ time. Hopefully this means I'll be brave enough to return to writing drabbles, if not full-blown fic.
> 
>  **Reader's Notes:** Eosrose asked for prompts for drabbles and I asked for Dan Howell swearing. She gave me this.  <3 <3 <3 Music is by [ Professor Kliq](http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Professor_Kliq/) from [this download link](http://freemusicarchive.org/music/download/732e77c7b3712ee4b0c36bd22604f30c7e8f7550) from [the free music archive](http://www.freemusicarchive.org).

## Stream the podfic:

You can stream this work here:

## Download:

[MP3](http://jelazakazone.parakaproductions.com/dirtymouth.mp3) or [MP4](http://jelazakazone.parakaproductions.com/dirtymouth.m4b)  
---  
  
"Fuck," Dan says matter-of-factly into the camera, in counterpoint to his usual boyish grin. "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. It's a nice word, isn't it? Fuck. Are you ever tempted to stand in the middle of a crowd and shout it out at the top of your lungs, letting the whole world know just what you think of the latest events in politics or the results of that night's game? Do you ever want to knock your co-workers upside the head for being insufferable gits, or kick your boss in the shine and cuss him out for being the most obnoxious arsehole imaginable? Me too. Unfortunately, that kind of behavior won't land you anywhere you want to be. If your luck is anything like mine, at the very least it'll get you a very awkward phone call from your mum.

"Luckily, I have a solution: just let it out. That's right guys, drop a few f-bombs! Every morning, while you're brewing your coffee, just let the curses fly. Let the world know exactly what you think of it. Say, 'Fuck you, world. You may get the best of me yet, but not today! Today I will persevere, so you can take your shite and dump it on someone else!'

"I promise you'll feel better afterward and you'll have an easier time putting up with all the bullshit fate will inevitably throw your way.

"For instance, earlier this afternoon I stopped off at the corner mart for what was supposed to be a quick detour to stock up on sweets on my way to a visiting my aunt for lunch. Can you guess where this is going? Yes. Yes, I got stuck in line behind one of those little old ladies who like to clear their wallets of coins. This woman counted out £7.35 penny by agonizing penny, I'm not even kidding. I was twenty minutes late for lunch and had to endure one of those lectures on the irresponsibility of youth. If I hadn't had a good morning swear, I would probably be calling Phil right now to have him break me out of the pysch ward.

"This has been a Public Service Announcement! Have a hella' good day!"

**[end]**

"Fuck yeah, baby! So, if you related to this video, feel free to leave a comment below sharing your own favorite swear words and methods of managing rage. If you know someone who might enjoy this video or someone who needs to see it, please share it around! To be alerted of when I upload a new video, you can click here to subscribe to my channel."


End file.
